Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
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