I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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