She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
