He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Randomize
