she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
