Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Randomize