That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize
