Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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