just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
