we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
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