My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
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