i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
