Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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