Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize