A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Someone shit on the floor
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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