chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
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