What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
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