I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
