Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
