Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize
