How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Randomize
