Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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