One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
