btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Randomize
