420 ftw
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
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