its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
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