so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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