Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
