Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
