ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
