Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
