I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
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you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
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I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
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