My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
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Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
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This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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