I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize
