i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
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