Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
