I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize