i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Randomize
