sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize