I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
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