I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize
