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• (828): View more from North Carolina

  I am a bulletproof tiger!

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?

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• (619): View more from California

  you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog

  (716): View more from New York

  do you not see the irony in that??

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.

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  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (785): View more from Kansas

  I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.

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• (716): View more from New York

  He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I am both scared and jealous.

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.

  (1-704): View more from North Carolina

  im still drunk. birthday week begins.

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.

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• 

  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (805): View more from California

  Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.

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• (573): View more from Missouri

  Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.

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• (626): View more from California

  i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!

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• (571): View more from Virginia

  This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs

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