He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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