I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
