Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
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