he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Randomize