Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
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