I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
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