I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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