i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Randomize
